INTRODUCTION to Series of Posts:  Sexuality, Sex, Gender, and Attraction: The Differences and Why They Matter

ALL HUMANS ARE MALE OR FEMALE—OR ARE THEY?

“Under the Trump administration, it will be the official policy of the United States government that there are only two genders: male and female.”

Donald Trump, December 22, 2024

            In a recent speech to a large gathering of the political action group, Turning Point USA, President-elect Trump made this alarming promise:

“With a stroke of my pen on day one, we are going to stop the transgender lunacy.”  

Apparently, the President-elect believes the word “transgender” refers only to individuals who want to or already have transitioned from one “gender” to another: i.e., from biological male to biological female, or female to male.[i] (To give him credit where it is due, at least he said “genders,” not “sexes.”)

            But for a leader of the U.S. to attempt to officially deny the existence of 1.6 million transgendered people,[ii] along with the approximately 1 out of 100 Americans who are biologically intersexed,[iii] and the unknown number of “cross-dressers” (formerly called “transvestites”) would be quite a “turning point” in U.S. history—in a backward direction.[iv]

Such a proclamation, and the legal decisions and discriminatory policies that no doubt would follow in numerous jurisdictions, would necessitate ignoring the scientific fact that numerous variations on gender have long existed and still do. Numerous variations on gender have been documented extensively in anthropology, historical writings, and photographs in diverse cultures over time.

In some cultures, “non-binary” and “gender non-conforming” individuals have been pariahs, persecuted for being, appearing and acting differently from expected social norms. But, in many cultures, such individuals have been embraced and celebrated as highly valued members of their society: as spiritual leaders, healers, heroic warriors and treasured family members.[v]

Transgendered people have been and are referred to by varying labels.[vi] In this country and European countries such individuals were once called “hermaphrodites” (now “intersex”); in India, they were called “Hijira”; in Latin America and Spain, they still are called “travesti”; some Native American tribes have what they call “two-spirit” people; in early Greece, castrated “eunuchs” were the trusted guardians of the palace family.

Occasionally, such individuals are referred to as a “third gender,”[vii] although in truth there are far more than just three variations of gender. In fact, those variations are innumerable.

For starters, chromosome pairs in human fetuses are not only the familiar combinations of XX (female) and XY (male). Some fetuses have chromosomal combinations such as XO (Turner’s syndrome), XYY (Klinefelter’s syndrome) and many other configurations that affect how a fetus develops its physical characteristics, dictate its ability to reproduce and influences even how they identify as “male” or “female.”   

America Is Not a “Melting Pot”

Someone can no more erase the fact of the existence of transgender people or diminish their value as human beings by official pronouncement than they can erase the fact that Americans also come in many skin colors, ethnicities, belief systems, and cultural identities. The population of the American continent is multi-racial, multi-cultural, differently abled, and multi-gendered and always has been.

Contrary to popular myth, there is no “melting pot” of Americans into one bland, unappetizing puree. Instead, we are more like a stew, consisting of the many colors and flavors and variations of human beings that populate this country.

Transgender as an Umbrella Term

The term “transgender” often has been used as an umbrella term encompassing various gender variations including conditions that are biologically determined and some that are social, psychological, or behavioral in nature.

  It includes not only people whose physical gender does not fit with their perception of their gender, but also those who identify as a male or female but dress or behave in ways that are typically associated with the other gender.

Did you notice that I did not say “opposite” gender? That is because male and females are not “opposites.” In truth, males and females are more alike than they are different.

In fact, until the fetal age of about six weeks, chromosomal males and females are indistinguishable by visual examination. For a fetus to develop into a male, seven key events must happen, in the right sequence, during the gestational period. Otherwise, the infant that is born will appear to be a female—but it will have male chromosomes and be unable to reproduce.

Ironically, if an alien visited Earth and saw adult male and female humans, it would notice very few differences between our genders, in comparison to the differences that would exist between Earthlings and itself.

Confused yet? If not, you are rare.

Widespread Confusion over Basic Concepts of Gender and Sexuality

Most people, including helping professionals, do not understand the essential distinctions between the concepts of gender, gender identity, gender roles, gender role identity, sexual orientation, and sexual orientation identity.

If Americans are going to have meaningful discourse about gender and create science-based policies regarding it, we first need to have a shared understanding, if not a common language, for discussing the components of gender, as just one part of the kaleidoscope of human sexuality.

Professionals in Different Disciplines Also Use Inconsistent Gender and Sexuality Terms

            Practitioners and scientists from different disciplines have their own preferences for terminology related to sex and gender, which reflects how they were trained to think about those aspects of the human condition.

            For example, if you say the word “gender” to writers on feminism or masculinity, they probably will think you are referring to how individuals are socialized to be masculine or feminine, not that you are talking about their genitalia and other reproductive body parts. To their way of thinking, feminization or masculinization relates to how a person conforms to the stereotypical behaviors expected of females and males in our society.

            But strike up a conversation with a gathering of fish biologists and use the word “gender” and they likely will assume you are referring to the reproductive equipment of fish. One topic of great concern to them is the notable increase in field-study findings of what they call the “feminization” of fish (i.e., fish with both male and female body parts due to exposure to environmental toxins.) Such fish are sterile (i.e., unable to reproduce), an observed fact that is reducing fish populations.

Some scientists speculate the same thing is happening to humans who are chronically overexposed to synthetic chemicals in our water, air, and consumer products, which disrupts the normal functioning of the “sex” hormones and can cause damage to chromosomes. This fact may be a contributor not only in the increase in transgender people but also in the decrease in human fertility.

            Fortunately, most helping professionals and medical providers now know there is no link between socialization and whether a child will grow up and be attracted to males, females, or both. (At least, progress has been made in the past 40 years!) But occasionally individuals still refer to sexual attraction differentially using such outdated terms as “sexual preference” or “sexual identity,” rather than the more accurate, respectful term “sexual orientation.”

Most professionals nowadays use the term “gender identity” to describe an individual’s perception of themselves as male, female, or a combination of both; others use the term “sexual identity” instead.

Sometimes parents, professionals and decision-makers who talk about sexuality and gender issues use the same language but mean very different things.

Equally perplexing to outside listeners is when a person uses different language to describe concepts but means the same thing. I once read a scientific research paper in which the author used the term “gender identity” to describe three different concepts in the same paragraph—each of them referring to a different aspect of gender.

If professional sexuality educators cannot agree about which terms to use, how can anyone else be expected to understand the concepts we are educating about?

A Colleague’s Call for Help

            While I was still a faculty member at The Evergreen State College, one day I received a call from a staff member who served as the campus ombudsperson. She had heard that I had expertise in the field of sexuality, and she needed a consult.

            She began by describing a young woman who was the focal point of a current grievance being handled by her office. The gist of the problem, she said, was that the girl was having difficulties coming to terms with her “sexual identity” and that it had caused issues within her peer group that led to the filing of the grievance.

            Knowing the various possibilities for what she meant by “sexual identity,” I needed to find out more before I could advise her. I started with the most likely one.

            “Is she wondering if she is straight, gay or bisexual?” I asked.

            “No, she’s very clear she’s a heterosexual.”

            “Is she unclear about whether she’s male or female?”

            “Oh, no. She knows she’s female.”

            I decided to try another tack.

            “Is she questioning the way she raised as a female and rejecting the traditional feminine role?”

            “If you mean, is she comfortable being feminine, the answer is yes. That’s not the problem.”

I admit that by this point I was stumped. I decided to just ask her what she meant by her use of the term “sexual identity.”

            She explained, “When this student first arrived at the college a few months ago, she was a virgin. Since then, she’s become very sexually active with a number of people, and it’s caused some strife in her peer group.”

            I finally got it! What she wanted to talk with me about was the young woman’s sexual behavior.

The crux of the students’ conflict having been identified, I then was able to suggest some approaches to dealing with the issue with the girl and her friends.

The Need for a Common Understanding of Gender and Sexuality Concepts

I never forgot this exchange and how perfectly it illustrated a fundamental problem in our society as it relates to sexuality: widespread lack of understanding of the basic concepts in that subject area.

Because of the differing personal, political, philosophical, and professional perspectives we might hold regarding sex and gender, and the terminology that diverse groups of people use to describe certain aspects, we might never agree on a common language to describe basic concepts about sex and gender.[1]

But at a minimum, we need to have a mutual understanding of what those concepts are, what they mean and why they matter.

A New Taxonomy of Gender and Sexuality Concepts

            While I was making the long drive from the western side of the Cascade Mountains in the Pacific Northwest to the far northeastern corner of Washington State where I was scheduled to do a training, I had plenty of time to ponder this dilemma and what could be done about it.

By the end of my drive there and back, I had conceptualized the basic outlines of a new classification grid to explain the basic concepts in sexuality, gender, and attraction.

What I created has proven to be extremely helpful to me and others in explaining the different concepts so we all can more effectively communicate with each other and others. My team and I used it in the creation of the Making Healthy Choices curriculum. I also have used it with remarkable success in training workshops around the country for helping professionals and employees in workplaces in increasing understanding and in reducing conflict.

Stopping the Anti-Transgender Lunacy

The more we understand gender and sexuality concepts, the less we will be vulnerable to being persuaded by false propaganda and prone to discrimination against gender-related targeted groups by politicians, plutocrats and others.

That would be a positive step forward, not backwards.

In an upcoming post, “Stop the Anti-Transgender Lunacy,” I will elaborate on the current political exploitation, social rejection and legalized oppression of transgender people and offer suggestions on how to counteract that disturbing trend.

The above post is intended to serve as an Introduction to an eight-part series of posts (and later, an in-depth handbook for parents, professionals and others) in which I will explain and illustrate concepts and other facts about the differences between sex, gender and attraction, and why they matter to all of us. 

The topics in both the series and the eventual book will include:

What is Sexuality?

Sex vs. Sexuality

Sex vs. Gender

Gender vs. Gender Identity

Gender Roles vs. Gender Role Identity

Sexual Orientation vs. Sexual Orientation Identity

Sexual Orientation Role vs. Sexual Orientation Role Identity

LBTQIA2S+, What? The Alphabet Soup of Gender Terms and What They Mean

[December 28, 2024]

Attachment in the Handouts: “Sex and Gender Concepts”

ENDNOTES:

[i] https://www.ohchr.org/en/sexual-orientation-and-gender-identity/intersex-people

[ii] https://williamsinstitute.law.ucla.edu/publications/trans-adults-united-states/

[iii] https://my.clevelandclinic.org/health/articles/16324-intersex

[iv] https://apnews.com/article/election-2024-transgender-rights-lgbtq-donald-trump-3bb3ace81ff32b6dec382b486ec6a772

[v] https://www.nationalgeographic.com/history/article/how-historians-are-documenting-lives-of-transgender-people

[vi] https://www.nationalgeographic.com/history/article/from-lgbt-to-lgbtqia-the-evolving-recognition-of-identity

[vii]   M. Michelraj, Asian Review of Social Sciences ISSN: 2249-6319 Vol. 4 No. 1, 2015, pp. 17-19 © The Research Publication, www.trp.org.in Historical Evolution of Transgender Community in India     ARSS-Vol.4-No.1-Jan-June-2015-pp.17-19.pdf